What would I attempt if I knew I could not fail....

Given the new momentum and focus of my life over the last 10 weeks or so - I am feeling confident and passionate about my ability to make my life what I want.

I feel like I am growing into myself - I am becoming the woman I've hoped to be for so long.

I am at the start of a long journey, a journey that feels like it's going to be an uphill battle for a while - however I am looking forward to every step, and the strength I will gain along the way.

I want to be the best I can be.

I don't want or need to be the best person or better than anyone else... I just want to the best I can be, I want to know that I have fulfilled my potential - no matter what that may be.

I feel like a kid at the start of the school year aiming for an 'A' or even an 'A+'.

I don't want to find myself at age 60 - 70 or 80 - looking back on my life - and thinking 'if only' or 'why didn't I just give it a go' or 'I could have done and become so much more'.

My new attitude and self belief has me preparing for the overhaul of the next section of my life...

What would I attempt if I knew I could not fail.......

... I would - No I will successfully create a writing career for myself.

I have had a passion for writing since I was seven years old.

My crushed confidence and self defeating internal dialogue have always told me I shouldn't even try because the defeat would be too devastating. The defeat would end a life long dream and then I would have nothing to look forward to in the future.

Well the new me is saying - a dream is no where near as good a goal that has been achieved.

I will not let fear hold me back!

Failure is not an option. Every step - whether deemed to be successful or unsuccessful - is a step towards making it happen. Either I have a win or I have a lesson - from which I can find an opportunity to grow.

I am ready to find a way to make this happen. I am ready to go for it!

Day 67! - Changes are happening!

I am really looking forward to exercise now.

I am feeling motivated and gasp! Proud of myself.

I am enjoying challenging myself and pushing myself harder. I am so happily surprised at my progress and my ability to quickly improve.

I am beginning to feel as though I am making contact with my personal power - I am feeling stronger. I am taking action and seeing results - It is such an empowering feeling.

My motions are gaining momentum. Every time I get on the treadmill or bike at work in my breaks - I am aiming to burn nothing less that 100 calories (three times a day that = 300 calories during a 12 hour shift).

I am feeling athletic, fitter and healthier. I feel like the world is my oyster - that optimistic feeling I think we all left high school with before the reality of life hit.

The past 67 days have been some what all consuming - I am eating, breathing, sleeping and practising health and healthy choices. I am keeping food and exercise diaries (a must I believe for a serious life change in the health department), I am focused and unwavering in creating my new life.

My current success and momentum are creating a confidence and appetite. Confidence in my ability to turn my goals into reality.

I am ready to embrace life with passion and have faith in my abilities to be successful...

Day 66! Motion = Emotion

Sundays are my 'weigh-in' day. Today is Tuesday. My goal this week is to lose 1.5 kgs.. I big call I know - but at least it is keeping me motivated to attend the gym time and time again.

I am feeling really good. I am feeling really energetic and healthy. My motivation is high and I am happy.

Seeing that my efforts can have results is very liberating.

I feel like a seed that has waited under the earth all winter - establishing roots and strong network to rely upon - and I am just now breaking through the earth and becoming visible - I am feeling the sun for the first time and basking in the success of creating momentum. Onwards and upwards.

I feel the more I move the better I feel.
Motion = emotion. Positive up beat motions = Positive up beat emotions.
Lack of motion = stagnancy. Sitting still physically (couch potato style) = lack of momentum.

Just like water I guess. You can ride the rapids or you can sit in the pond and go no where.

Day 65! -Challenges = Opportunites-

So to keep me motivated day to day I have created a collection of visual aids....

I have gone through my diary for the next 6 months and added weigh-in dates and inspirational quotes...

I have created a graph so I can map out my weight losses, and see the big picture all at once.

I have also come to a comfortable place within myself (which for me is rather unusual) I have come the conclusion:

• I am at the perfect time and place.
  
• Everything is as it should be.
• My goals are becoming reality.
• My hard work is creating results.

This may seem minimal or trivial. But for me this a big break through.

I have lived the last few years in a constant state of tension - a constant knot in my stomach telling me that I am so behind - I have no chance of achieving any of the goals I set myself, the minutes are ticking by so fast - and what have I achieved - nothing!!....

I am now in a place where I can see the hard work paying off, and not only am I content to continue the hard work - I am motivated and inspired to apply the same amount of hard work to other areas of my life.

My life really is changing. I am changing. My destiny is changing. I am falling in love with life.

I am embracing the challenges life is throwing at me and making them into opportunities - totally empowering!!!

Day 64! Can I find the love?...

Today is day 64 of becoming a new me.....

64 days ago I started a journey to lose weight. I knew the journey would entail facing all the issues / demons I have regarding my past, that lead to me putting the weight on.. I guess I wasn't really prepared for just how confronting and consuming the journey would be...

So far I have lost 7 kgs..

In place of the 7 kgs I have developed a healthy love of the gym, (most days) and a playful competitiveness against myself and my previous results and times...

Losing weight has been on my 'to-do' list for some time. However with a large task I think we often put it off - because it is too big - or we can start tomorrow - or in my case I would eat well all week and then not see any results - so I would deem the whole practise to be a worthless exercise in self cruelty.

However 64 days ago something changed in me. I think something has been changing in me everyday since then too. I am proud that I have stuck with it this long. I am proud that I am starting a new life style - not just a diet.

The pride I have found for myself is a new and foreign concept to me.

To congratulate myself and be proud was the first step in finding me. I realised that over the last few years I have been anything but my own best friend. I have been treating myself less than I would ever want my friends or loved ones to treat themselves... I would be quick to judge and criticise myself. I would be in a constant state of disgust at my hopelessness and lack of success..

I didn't even really realise it until one day at work..

I work 12 hour shifts and aim to fit in at least 35 min of exercise on my breaks during the day (for example: 13 mins first break, 10 mins second break, 12mins last break) ((breaks are 30 minutes long)) it is a hard routine to keep up as the breaks are not negotiable - 1 minute late back has you in the hot seat and the breaks still need to include a toilet stop, food and a water bottle top up...

On this one particular day in the last 64 - I found myself leaving the change room totally disgusted with myself - I even caught myself saying - hopeless idiot - only had one goal to achieve today and all you could manage to do is 28 mins...

Then a part of me stood up to defend me that I had not previously met. It said - Lay off - you have achieved 28 minutes of hard work out time today - you should be proud.

I was stunned. I was also intrigued. Who was that? Where did that come from? Was it really alright to be proud of myself? Could I just let myself off the hook with a well done? It seemed wrong to skip over the self hatred....

And yet it felt so good.

How could I access this inner strength more often? It had felt so good it was like needing a hit of some fantastic drug again....

This was the day I started to like myself again, and realise I have inner strength.

Even with out the 7 kg weight loss - that moment alone made the last 64 days worth while.

I now have a bigger goal of trying to find love for myself now..... It feels weird to even say that - foreign - we are taught at a young age that 'loving yourself' is a sign of a big ego - or something just rude and wrong.

I believe though that loving yourself is as basic as treating yourself as you would your best friend, your lover or your sister. You are there for you and you accept and encourage you with kind words.

New me here I come.... New me - you are doing a great job!

This might be good time to mention the following website: http://futureme.org/ if you need some extra motivation - or even just a laugh - give this a go.

Quote of the day - How it relates to my current path...

If you want your life to be a magnificent story, then begin by realising that you are the author and everyday you have the opportunity to write a new page. -Mark Houlahan


This quote really gels with me at the moment as I am on a new path and I am writing a new story for myself. I have made many changes to my thinking and my daily routines which has without a doubt changed my life.

There is another quote swimming in my thoughts at the moment, along the lines of; To change your whole life, all you need is to change your thoughts....

I don't know who to credit that quote with, or if it is even a correct recreation of it. But I can honestly say without a shadow of doubt - this quote is true and correct in every way.

Any bad situation you may have - ANY bad situation can be changed in an instant if you just change your thoughts about it..

For instance: my childhood was so terrible, I hate my parents, they didn't even try to be good parents, they were too caught up in their own lives to care about me....
Some people will carry this thought their whole lives and inevitably re-enact their childhood for their kids - and so continues the cycle....

However if you just change your thoughts to: My parents could have done a better job, but I am thankful for their mistakes because it has made me so much stronger. I have learnt to look after myself, without the lessons they taught me (no matter how harsh and unfair they were) I wouldn't have achieved all that I have or have the burning passion to give my children a much better life. I have become a better person because of it, and I wouldn't change it for the world..

You can tell which path is the more empowering of the two... I guess I strayed down that tangent briefly because it is pertinent to where I am now.

I have been wading through my past - which I believed to be terrible and unjust (which it is) however I have realised that holding on to hurt - only keeps me hurting... It has no effect on the people I hold responsible. In fact I am taking all responsibility away from them and all the power I have allowed them to have over the last few years... I am in charge of my own life - my own feelings - my emotions - my success - my failures.

In fact I am going one step further.. I am going to use the hurt as fuel, I am using it to give me power and drive. I have forgiven them... Well maybe that is still a stretch, but I am willing to forgive them - I want it to be over with, I don't want them in my thoughts, I don't want to continue to be their victim. I am my own success. I am in control.

All of the hurt and time I've wasted thinking about the past is going into my fuel tank for energy. I am passionate about turning my life around. I am dedicated to being the best I can be. They can't stop me from achieving anything I want.... I thank them (my family) for all the unnecessary pain - without it I wouldn't have anything to prove and wouldn't be so passionate about being the best I can......

So for all the pain, hurt, bad decisions, abandonment and endangerment - THANK YOU - from the bottom of my heart. It has made me who I am, it is now the corner stone for my success.

From here on out I am writing my own story....

Why does losing weight, feel like I am losing me?

The path to losing weight (serious weight - not just 5 kgs for summer) is paved with emotional land mines.

Generally speaking no-one just gets fat because they don't have a good nutritional understanding. It is generally a long path of bad eating, over eating and comfort eating.

For most people getting fat is directly related to pain - whether they can identify that pain or not. Whether they have ever considered it or not, over eating and late night eating (just like drinking alcohol or taking drugs) is to numb a pain - a discomfort - or a general sense of lacking - or a need of something - perhaps I will get it from this packet of chips - or ice cream etc.

Something interesting I have noticed about myself is when I catch a glimpse in the mirror and notice I am shrinking - or there is less of me - I have a fleeting moment of panic.

I should be elated! I should be excited - however something in me always screams - I am losing me!!

I think the extra weight has been like a security blanket for me. You can't hurt me if you can't really see me.

This is something that I am working through and analysing. I need to let go of what ever is making me think and feel that.

One memory that springs to mind is - a day we were walking back from the beach (mum, dad, my sister and I) and we stopped in the street to speak with some locals (the gossiping locals, who were always on the look out for something new to spread) and dad made a point of commenting on and joking about the size of my thighs, and the wobble they had in front of everyone (I was about 10 or 11 years old).

They were all laughing and I was left standing there mortified. I had felt free and uninhibited during that walk before that moment.

I think that something changed in me that day. To protect myself from my dad - I need to hide myself from him. I still feel it today 20 years later - when he looks at me he judges me - he thinks his comments are funny - but really they are heartbreaking and soul destroying.

However I am now on a path that allows me to convert that pain into a positive. The strength I have had to muster over the years to deal with a man like that has made me a better person. I am not going to be bitter about it - or give him any power over me and my spirit.

I am going to use it as fuel on my fire. Call me fat did you, well look at me now.

Quote of the day

"If you want to be happy, set a goal that commands your thoughts, liberates your energy, and inspires your hopes."
- Andrew Carnegie


I love this quote! - It is so true.

If you want to be happy and feel alive - you need to have a driving force - a goal - a future image of yourself and your life that motivates you daily and has you hungry.

2009 - My Goals - Part 1 - Personal Growth

I believe a big part of personal growth is:

• analysing yourself
• understanding who you are
• why you are you
• how you became you
• what your strengths are
• what holds you back
  
• what are your fears
• what are your dreams and goals
• what are your beliefs, values and morals
• what is your perfect life - why aren't you living it
• what makes you truly happy
• what feeds your soul

You need to understand yourself better than you understand your best friend or partner. - Not just defend yourself and your actions on a day to day basis. But to truly understand why you think, feel, react and respond the way you do. Why do you believe what you do?

I plan on asking myself the tough questions and answering them honestly and in-depth. I plan on sharing them with you on this blog during the course of the year. I plan on being closer to me, my goals and fulfilment before the year is out.

I have consumed everything personal growth, positive thinking and personal empowerment, over the last few years at an increasing rate.

As a student I feel I have passed level 1 - Understanding 101. I feel I have the overview of what creates success. I am now at the point of putting it into motion.

It is one thing to understand, it is a completely different arena to get out there and do it.... Probably much like a surgical student standing over their first patient with a scalpel in their hand. They understand, but until you have done it repetitively you don't really know.

So I stand before you and before myself - ready. Ready to give myself and my life all I have. I am ready to try and try again. I ready to be brave and reach for my goals. I am releasing my fears, I am embracing hope and my personal power.

The goal is to find love for myself, and turn my dreams into goals then reality.

I am going to achieve my goals without excuses, without reasons why it is too hard or why I can't do it. From now on it is all about how I am going to do it.

We have all been created equal, we all have a body, a mind and 24 hours in the day to use them.

If it is possible for someone else - it is possible for me.

Today I start down a new path. No map, no answers, just questions and my internal compass..

Dreamtime - 8 Jan - Family

Last night I dreamt that we had moved house (not unusual for me - I've moved 17 times since leaving home) however I dreamt that we had moved to Adelaide (that is not likely to happen) and my family was there. They were helping us to unpack and get settled. The house wasn't particularly nice - not something we would usually live in - and the family was acting like family...

That is the unusual part of the dream. My family fell apart years ago, they abandoned my sister and left us in an unsafe place, with out even calling once in a while to check on us.

My interpretation: Before bed last night I was asking myself why it bothers me so much to see people who never leave their home town (or home). People who move out of mum and dad's house, move in with their boyfriend get married have kids and never achieve anything else. I am going to write a blog entry exploring the frustration...

So my cousin is one of those people, and so are a lot of my family members, they all live in Adelaide near each other and they have never thought about moving on or finding something else in life. I think the dream was probably brought on by my train of thought before bed, along with the belief that if I had stayed near them geographically, then they would have made an effort to be a family.

http://dreammoods.com says: Family
To see your own family in your dream, represents security, warmth and love. It could also symbolize bitterness, jealousy, or rivalry, depending on your relationship with your family. Alternatively, it could mean that you are overly dependent on your family, especially if the family members are in your recurring dreams .Consider also the significance of a particular family member or the relationship you have with them.

Well I am not dependant on my family. I don't feel warmth or security from them (in my own home everything is great - this is just in relation to my extended family).

Perhaps it means rivalry. The cousin who was the main character in my dream, is the cousin I use to look up and want to be like. However over the last few years the respect I once had for her has diminished.

Dreamtime - 7 Jan - Bushfire

Last night I dreamt there were bush fires were in our region. I had packed a bag and was prepared to get the pets in the cars if need be. However we were not told we were in any danger so we went to have a family BBQ, when we got there we realised we would have to go home and get out. The drive back to the house showed houses that were burnt out - gardens and paddocks on fire. We got the pets into the cars and went to leave in a convoy...

My interpretation: My work involves emergencies, especially fires. The weather has been hot lately, perhaps it is a work related dream....

http://dreammoods.com says: Fire
Depending on the context of your dream, to see fire in your dream can symbolise destruction, passion, desire, illumination, transformation, enlightenment, or anger. It may suggest that something old is passing and something new is entering into your life. Your thoughts and views are changing. In particular, if the fire is under control or contained in one area, then it is a metaphor of your own internal fire and inner transformation. It also represents your drive and motivation.

Something old is passing - and something new is entering into your life - this is so true. I am currently going through major transformations in a couple of areas of my life (I'll explore this later in another entry).

I am in a phase of desire - burning passionate desire to turn my dreams into reality.

My thoughts and views are changing! The fires that I saw in my dream were no real threat - which would then suggest a metaphor for my own internal fire and inner transformation.

Dreamtime - 6 Jan - Snotty Nose

This was a little odd - and I am not sure if the dream dictionary will be able to interpret this one!

Basically I dreamt I was blowing my nose - and I was getting heaps and heaps of snot out of it. It was flowing freely and I was really enjoying the sensation of clearing out and the ease of which it was clearing.

My interpretation: Getting a clear head? Clear thoughts? I have had sinus problems for a long time - and have been looking to heal them - perhaps it symbolises getting healthier.

http://dreammoods.com says: Nose
To see your own nose in your dream, signifies a conscious effort to achieve whatever endeavour you chose to undertake. The nose represents energy, intuition, and wisdom. Your dream may suggest your need to learn more about a situation at hand. Alternatively, the nose symbolises curiosity, as in being nosy.

Spot on in the first sentence - I am in a phase of determination to achieve.

I do feel as though my intuition is becoming stronger and I am trusting it more - perhaps the clearing of the mucus was representing a cleansing of my intuitive powers.

Dreamtime - 5 Jan - Blindness

Last night was a horrifying dream. I was loosing my vision. My eyes were getting so blurry it was as though I was blind. If I turned my head to the side I could catch glimpses of things. We had moved into a new place and I felt so lost - I couldn't find my way around. I collapsed in the entrance way and people were stepping over me and wouldn't help. We also slept in a tent on the street for a while and when my partner and I went to go for a romantic carriage ride, we had a big fight and I left - I think it was meant to be our honeymoon..

My Interpretation: I am not seeing something for what it really is - I am blind to something.. I don't feel as though people are particularly helpful.

http://dreammoods.com says: Eyes
To dream that your eyes are injured or closed, suggests your refusal to see the truth about something or the avoidance of intimacy. You may be expressing feelings of hurt, pain or sympathy.

To dream that you cannot open your eyes, indicates that there is a waking situation that you are just plain refusing to see or acknowledge.

Alternatively, your inability to open your eyes may be physiological in reason. When we sleep, our eyes are closed (no kidding). So in dreaming that you are trying to open your eyes, your mind may actually be telling you to really open your eyes to the point where you actually wake up.

Ok. I can see two possibilities here. My little cat (I have a big and little cat) is really sick at the moment - I feel responsible. I also feel sympathy for the poor little fella.

However I also feel a strong attachment to - my physical body trying to open my eyes. I work 12 hour night shifts and I am afraid of falling asleep at work. I often dream that I am sleeping at work and trying to wake up - or that I have just woken up at work at there are emergencies that are going unattended... I was on night shift during this dream.

Dreamtime - 4 Jan - Plane Swooping

My dreams are usually quite long - I normally wake feeling as though I have been watching movies all night. I am only grabbing small sections of dreams that either I thought about all the next day - or were most vivid upon waking....

Last night I dreamt I was in a house (it wasn't my house or one I ever recall being in) and I was at a window near the front door. We had the door locked and were scared because there was an air plane swooping aggressively at the door.

My interpretation: I am not sure really... I guess it shows a feeling of being attacked, or under threat. I have had some plane crash dreams lately - with me on board the flight - and I have dreamt of that house before, but last time there was a whole gang of bikers trying to get in...

http://dreammoods.com says: Airplanes
To see an airplane in your dream, indicates that you will overcome your obstacles and rise to a new level of prominence and status. You may experience a higher consciousness, new-found freedom and greater awareness. Perhaps you need to gain a better perspective or wider view on something.

Airplane crash: your lack of confidence, self-defeating attitude and self-doubt toward the goals you have set for yourself is represented by the crashing airplane; you do not believe in your ability to attain those goals. Loss of power and uncertainty in achieving your goals are also signified.

Based on this I feel it could be my goals, dreams and higher consciousness are all awaiting me - however I have locked myself away - because I lack confidence and fear I can't achieve the standards I have set. I feel I have been taking my time and I often feel my dreams are showing I need to jump in the saddle and start getting the job done. I think the plane represents 'stop hiding, get out here, you can't hide from me'

Dreamtime - 3 Jan - Dad Chasing Us

Scary Dream. I dreamt that my dad was chasing my sister and I. He was wildly angry, violent and nasty. We were planning an escape - an escape to interstate - things were falling into place - we had some assistance from friends and family. When the get away car came for us we ran to it jumped in the back seat and it took off - he ran after the car - pulled out a camera and took a photo of the number plate so he could trace us.

My interpretation: This is very much history repeating - most of this has happened in the past - except for the assistance. My sister and I were very young and we had to make our own escape without any help. It wasn't as dramatic as in the dream - however there was a night that he ran at the car as we were trying to leave the house and it kept stalling as he was getting closer.. Scary.

We have recently moved interstate and dad came to visit not long ago. Perhaps it is a fear that he now knows exactly where to find us again... And it is a regular occurrence for these dreams to surface around Christmas and New Year.

One other theory is that as I am working through my old issues I seem to dream the situation playing out - the way I wish it had years ago..... When I dream about my mum she is now free of dad, she was able to leave and be happy (this didn't actually happen) but after having the dream it felt as though some things had been put right, and a weight had been lifted. It felt as though I connected with her and we had put some old issues to rest.

"I'm Being Chased" Chase dreams often stem from feelings of anxiety in your walking life. Ask yourself who is the one chasing you and you may gain some understanding and insight on the source of your fears and pressure.

The pursuer or attacker who is chasing you in your dream may also represent a part of yourself.

****Next time you have a chase dream, turn around and confront your pursuer. Ask them why they are chasing you.�

This is a scary prospect - but extremely good advice. I just said that I felt dreaming about my mum cleared up some issues for me. Perhaps I can do the same with my dad?...

Dreamtime - 2 Jan - Sis at Work / Something else

I dreamt my sister was at my place of employment doing comms work on the radio. (I work in an emergency call-taking and dispatching centre) She was organising for a pile of manure to be cleaned off the road. She was new at the job - and was already working at a level above me - we were laughing that her first job in the role was a pile of c*ap...

My interpretation is: We are waiting for a new batch of workers to be recruited - so we have been talking about her applying there. It is possible this is a dream that just reflects my daily life, with no real message.

However work did seem scary in the dream, it was night time and I did feel lost. I also feel that my sister (even though she is my little sis) is more successful than me in many ways. So perhaps it was a fear that she would come into my work place and do much better than me....

http://dreammoods.com says: Work
To dream that you are at work, indicates that you are experiencing some anxiety about a current project or task. The dream may also be telling you that you need to "get back to work".� Perhaps you have been slacking and need to pick up the pace.


*** Something else***

Something that has been happening a bit lately is, not really dreaming... I have been getting lists of names and things in my sleep state - however it feels as though someone is actually trying to communicate with me, the problem is I can't really seem to recall the names and lists when I wake. I am yet to work out what this is all about. I will continue to try and decipher these happenings and the meaning...


someone talking to me - giving me lists - giving me names - when I woke up I could only get impressions not the whole thing

Dreamtine - 1 Jan - Baby Pram

I won't bore you with all the details of my dreams (I wish some of my work mates would follow this lead) - I will just capture sections of them I feel are important to me.

I dreamt I was pushing a baby carriage, I was trying to make my through the crowd to a 'somewhere', it was as though I was going about my usual day - however I was running late, or anxious to get there....

My interpretation: I am getting to the age where I need to decide if and when I am going to have kids. Some days I think it is no big deal - and other days I think I have left it too late and I should be pregnant now... I do want a family, however I want to do it at the right time, in the right way.

The meaning as taken from: http://dreammoods.com

Baby Carriage
To see a baby carriage in your dream, symbolizes your desire for a family or longing for a baby. If the baby carriage is empty, then it indicates sadness or an unfulfilled goal. Alternatively, it suggests that you need to cater to the needs of your own inner child.

Don't say I have to, Say I choose to....

After talking about attitude yesterday, I wanted to make another attitude-definition today.

I believe attitude is the most valuable currency you can hold. It can also be the most poisonous and vile.

Your vocabulary and your internal dialogue reflects your real feelings, and programs your compass. Consider the difference in saying:

• I have to go to work today, and
• I choose to go to work today, or
• I get to go to work today

Try to stop saying I have to, as this makes you feel forced, pressured and controlled. You don't have to go to work today. You could quit, you could call in sick or you could buy a plane ticket and leave the country.

Some people will say - No I do have to go to work today, I have a mortgage to pay, or food to buy or kids to look after. So, perhaps the better attitude to have is; I choose to go to work today so I can continue make the dream of owning my own home come true.

The bigger picture holds a happier view, and reflects a better attitude.

It is so easy to get caught up in the day to day running of your life and forget about what is important. Before you know it you have been in a dead end job for 30 years, you are bitter and angry, your family no longer feels connected to you and all you have been focusing your energy on - doesn't even matter.

The job doesn't care if you had the highest attendance rate of all the staff. The job (and probably management) don't respect you for never having the courage to move on and grow as a person.

The job doesn't care that you run yourself into the ground pretending to be a martyr - and doing everything for everyone else...

All you have done is made the choice to be unhappy and stuck with it. That is not a success or an achievement in any one's book.

Life is like a house you have built from the ground up with your own hands. Everything in it reflects your choices, your decisions and your attitude.

You can never blame anyone, you can never blame circumstances for anything you are not happy with. It was your choice. You chose everything. You chose your response, your course of action (or inaction), your point of view and when to stop aiming for more.


Empower yourself with positive self talk.

Take responsibility for your actions, your decisions and your choices.

Your Opinion of the World, is a Confession of Your Character

So everyday I strive to find an inspirational quote, a positive thought or an enlightening point-of-view.

Today my favourite quotes are:

• Successful people work with what they have, and they get what they want.

I love this quote because it teaches responsibility and a can-do attitude. I am so over people saying 'I can't', 'Things will never change', 'It's too hard', 'I'm too old', 'I could never do that' or 'That's just the way it is'.

I firmly believe life is what you make of it. What you put in, you get back.

I once had a friend who always found herself in crazy situations, and had the funniest most outrageous stories to tell. Even if she had just nipped down the street for a carton of milk, she would return saying 'You'll never believe what just happened to me'....

I couldn't work out for the longest time why life would just choose to have fun with her. How could she possibly time her day in a way that would always lead to her experiencing all the fun and funny stuff.

Then when I watched and listened I realised it was her. She would leave the house with a fun and zany outlook on life, she was expecting to have a good time, a fun time, a laugh at herself or a laugh at the circumstances that were presented to her. Because of this expectation - that is what she saw, that is what she experienced.

What you give out, your get back.... If she had left the house expecting to get cut off in traffic, expecting to have her parking space stolen and expecting to be at the end of a long slow moving que at the shop, only to be served by a rude and inconsiderate check-out assistant, then this is what would happen to her.

The exact same circumstances will play out around you - it all comes down to what you focus on, and what your attitude is.

Being stuck in the long slow que can be a great time to chat to those around you, have a giggle with your shopping buddy, lighten the mood for all those around you, and invite them to have a fun interaction with you.

Or being stuck in a long slow que could result in you huffing loudly every 30 seconds to show your disapproval, checking your watch once a minute - generally when the check-out assistant is looking in your direction. And/or making remarks to those in line with you about the incompetence you feel the employee is displaying....

Both scenarios have very different outcomes for the way your day pans out. The same actions day after day have an effect on your week. The same actions week after week impact on your year and your life...

This is one of the easiest ways to create a happier and more fulfilling life, just have a good attitude. Look for what is good. Look for what is fun, look for what will make you smile - and you will find it.

The title of today's blog reflects my second quote:

• "People seem not to see that their opinion of the world is also a confession of character." - (Ralph Waldo Emerson)
  
  

What a great quote! People don't seem to see how their opinion of the world and it's daily happenings shows their attitude and some of their core beliefs.

Some of the opinions that come to mind include:

• Life is so hard
• Life is such a struggle
• You work, you pay taxes, you die
• Yeah well I can't do anything about it
• Everyone is on their own, look out for number one
• No one ever does the right thing, I've got do it all myself
• Life is nothing but pain. It's one thing after another.

• There is so much love in the world
• This year is going to be great
• Bring on the next challenge I am ready to grow
• I am so thankful
• Life has been good to me
• I am so lucky to be surrounded by such wonderful people
• There is so much beauty in everyday

There is a world of difference in the two lists.

They are two completely different lifestyle choices. It is a choice. Your attitude is the only thing you really have control over. You can't control people or circumstances, you can't control the traffic or the ques, but you can control your attitude to it how you act.

Your attitude is the compass that guides you through the day, the year and your life. What is yours calibrated to?

Dreams - The Open Window To The Subconscious

I am a very active dreamer. I love to dream, I dream vividly and I enjoy interpreting the meanings and messages.

I believe dreams are the subconscious having it's say. I believe they offer the keys and advice we generally want in our day to day life, and I believe they can be a place for the other side to talk to us.

Last night or should I say this morning (due to some New Years celebrations) I had a dream. It was a very vivid dream about a black duck flying around above me - it was a huge duck and it had eggs in a nest in a tree (it obviously wasn't an accurate documentary on the nesting habits of ducks) but it was a very forceful dream..... I don't like that word - but it was as though the image kept replaying and trying to burn it's self into my memory, not stopping until it was definitely going to be remembered upon waking.

I looked up the meaning of the dream, and this is what I found:

To see bird eggs in your dream, symbolizes money (awesome, you can't complain about that!)

To see flying ducks in your dream, represents spiritual freedom. Ducks are multi-talented animals that can walk, swim and fly and thus may represent your flexibility and in blending into various situations.

Birds: To dream of chirping and/or flying birds, represents joy, harmony, ecstasy, balance, and love. It denotes a sunny outlook in life. You are experiencing spiritual freedom and psychological liberation. It is almost as if a weight has been lifted off your shoulders.

These are from the Dream Moods website: http://www.dreammoods.com

Isn't it funny how reading an interpretation can clearly and concisely sum up a point that was previously an unexplored emotion, or a vague feeling. I brushed on this in yesterday's blog - but I didn't really explore the whole situation.

I am currently feeling freer and happier. I feel like this is my time to shine, and this year I am going to start experiencing success by my standards, in areas that matter to me. I feel I am on the path to happiness and enlightenment, and I feel that letting go of my fears and excuses has been a liberating experience.

I am really excited to see what I will be writing exactly one year from today in this blog. Will I be summing up my greatest successes and reaching for new goals I never thought were possible? Will I be proud of myself? Will I be happier?

All I can do is try.
Not trying is failure.
To fail while trying is a lesson learned and therefore a success in it's self.